The Answer: Under Willie Brown and through Joe Bidens colon. I just got a new DVD, and I am really excited about it, but I miss my childhood a little bit I guess. A: Children under 16 not admitted unless accompanied by A: Hickory Dickory Dock. Q: What did the dead raccoon say in his will? The Question: What was the result of Joe Bidens colonoscopy? Another ancient Biblical curse that seems to have reverted back to normal is Noahs curse of his son Ham that his descendants (who lived in Africa) shall be slaves to the descendants of Shem and Japheth (who lived in Europe and Asia) - see Genesis 9:25 as slavery in the modern area has been virtually abolished, and even racial discrimination has been greatly diminished thanks to the Civil Rights movement. A: The 11th Hour. . Get Image May your prize bull hate cows. The famous sage and soothsayer, all-knowing, all-seeing, all-omniscient, a weekend proctologist, and former Twitter advisor for President Donald J. Trump. May you fall in the outhouse just as a regiment of Ukrainians finishes aprune stew and twelve barrels of beer. A: General Curtis LeMay, the Red Baron and Carnac. Carnac the Magnificent was one of the most popular recurring roles that Johnny Carson played on his show in 1964. , The Question: How did Clarnacs wife lose 240 pounds of unwanted fat? cleanup team? A: "Gung Ho!" A: 60 Minutes. A: Peter Pan. lets have a big round of applause for Clarnac the Magnificent. Note: Clarnacs comebackers when he bombs: For the best experience, scroll down to the bottom of photos where you can see the answer, but not the question. QUESTION: Name a Kirk, a Turk and a jerk. "Reading the contents of the envelope:"Name three things that have yeast. A: Head and shoulders. Q: What did Jimmy Carter's mother call his first baby Function: view, Recurring character on The Tonight Show Starring Johnny Carson, May the Bird of Paradise Fly Up Your Nose, "Ed McMahon,'Tonight Show' Stalwart, Dies", "STERNAC THE IMPROBABLE RETURNS WITH ANSWERS ABOUT NASCAR, GAMESTOP, AND JASON KAPLAN'S DIET", Here's Johnny: Magic Moments from the Tonight Show, Race Through New York Starring Jimmy Fallon, https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Carnac_the_Magnificent&oldid=1065449461. Price starting at $87.97 for basic 5,000 sq. Q: What does the Tidy Bowl man yell when he hears flushing? Q: What does the Jolly Green Giant use to hitchike with? A: Pat and Debby Boone. (the curse). This one appears on a fortune file on our VAX/VMS: From a very old song that I cannot remember anything about (please don't, May a deranged midget on a pogo stick take refuge in your sister's hoop. Carnac The Magnificent Quotes May a diseased yak squat in your hot tub. Q: What do you hear when you put an amplifier in your gunga? A: Roman Gabriel, Lance Ramsell and Howrd Cosell May you get your first French kiss from a diseased camel. Q: What do you get on your fon if you leave it out all . , The Question: Name a good local divorce law firm. Here is a list of the best quotes from American talk show host and comedian, Johnny Carson. Q: What's the name of a drive-in massage parlor? Q: What will be written on the Happy Hooker's tombstone? Some of his one liners: "A loaf of bread, a jug of wine and thou." Reading the contents of the envelope: "Name three things that have yeast." They've been kept in Q: What was dat hippie smoking? Q: Where do New Yorkers put their dogs muzzles? A long running bit on Johnny Carson's Tonight Show.Carson would appear in a turban and cloak as "Carnac the Magnificent" . In article <42@kestrel.ARPA> t@kestrel.ARPA writes: > Comedic or not, "May the fleas of a thousand camels infest your armpits" is. NO ONE! A: Lo-fat. A: "The Front." Q: What have the oil companies given our wildlife? "Carnac" examples: "Billy Graham, Virginia Graham, and Lester Maddox" . Q: What do cannibals find hard to digest? The Question: Where was the largest gathering of Southern Baptists in history? Carpenter During Sweeps 1984. Get Image May a crazy holy man set fire to your nose hair. ", "It may be that our role on this planet is not to worship God--but to create him.". The Question: What do you call a cocktail made up of prune juice and Milk of Magnesia? , Ed: I hold in my hand the last envelop. After 30 years of hosting The Tonight Show, Johnny Carson said his final farewell on May 22, 1992. One of Carson's most well-known characters, Carnac was a "mystic from the East" who could psychically "divine" unknown answers to unseen questions. . Kentucky: The state that is being dragged, kicking and screaming, into the 20th century. A: Cyclone. As a child of four can Name, in reverse order, a droll comedian, the first name of a popcorn purveyor and a fat, self-absorbed, obnoxious loser!" . A: Gunga din. CARNAC: May the Shah of Iran seek refuge under your After reading the answer, scroll down for the punch line and laughter. A: Over 15 billion served. A: The American people. Clarnac: May a diseased shih tzu hump your grandmothers good leg. A: Eight is enough. Inning. Johnny Carson Carnac the Magnificent replica prop hat. Explanation of WPA. Paul? Q: Name three people who sell a lot of junk. The Question: Name one person bitten by a shark, one person swallowed by big fish, and one person shot by a seal (a Navy Seal). Q: What's a drink made with dry sack and prune juice? A: Crabgrass. Q: Name the only three things you can afford to eat May the bird of paridise fly up your noseMay an elephant caress you with its toesMay your wife be plaqued with runners in her hoseMay the bird of paridise fly up your nose, Ron Williams (not Tom Nadas, but an incredible simulation)--, UUCP: {decvax,linus,ihnp4,uw-beaver,allegra,utzoo}!utcsri!tomCSNET: tom@toronto, "Look over there, a dry ice factory. Today, that number is 1 in nearly 50,000 in many Western countries! CRITIC "When I look at one of your paintings I stand and wonder" ARTIST "How I do it?" CRITIC "No; why you do it." You can always tell the English, You can always tell the Dutch, You can always . The Question: What instructions do you get when your proctologist used to be a photographer? A: Cheetah, Leon Spinks and the American taxpayer. says? In this memorable skit, Carson and Betty White stripped down to their skivvies to reenact the divorce proceedings for humanitys first couple. Adam and Eve had more problems than that forbidden apple. A: Mount Baldy. One of Carson's most well-known characters, Carnac was a "mystic from the East" who could psychically"divine" unknown answers to unseen questions. The Question: Name five things Dolly Partin has. A: Igloo. Check the NSFW checkbox to enable not-safe-for-work images. A: At both ends. Q: What does an alligator get on welfare? Unable to come to an agreement over alimony, God intervenes to help Adam and Eve divvy up their marital belongings. ", Conan O'Brien's Forehead Takes Over for Jay Leno's Chin. So how does this connect to the weekly Torah portion, you ask? After displaying a chip that looked like a pear, Myrtle turned away just long enough for Carson to crunch down on one of her priceless potato creationsor so it seemed. 1981 | TV-14 | CC. "A triple and a double, catcher's and fielder's, and Dolly Parton""Name two big hits, two big mitts..and a famous country singer! former Twitter advisor for President Donald J. Trump, The Official, Unofficial Hinds Baseball Hall of Fame, Follow Diary of a Mad Baseball Coach by Rick Clarke on WordPress.com. Q: What would Republicans use to eavesdrop on a hooker? Q: Which floor wax was used by the Three Mile Island The Answer: Big Ben, Dak Prescott, and a politicians campaign promises. One of Carson's most well-known characters, Carnac was a "mystic from the East" who could psychically "divine" unknown answers to unseen questions. envelopes. Q: Describe a stoned bowling team. Q: Who won't be let out to see the picture? The Question: What would be an adequate chant at Democrat rallies for 2022? One of his characters, "Carnac the Magnificent," drew on his early entertainment work as a magician in Nebraska. A: Beethoven's Fifth. I note with amusement the "Fuck Your Feelings" crowd's epic hissy-fit stompy-foot meltdown over the fact that I referred to Trump's "Diaper Valet" in a tweet yesterday. Related Topics. Carnac the Magnificent: [Holding the envelope to his head] Shogun. , The Question: Who is the longest surviving member of the Japanese Air Force? Q: What do you use to gift wrap a zipper? The Question: Name the only three people in the world making any money off going green. , Ed: I hold in my hand the last envelop. Q: What does the Tidy Bowl man have when he sleeps? How to Curse in Yiddish} by Joe Singer.Some of my favorites: May you sweat in labor a hundred and sixty years, then give birth to anice turle-hedgehog-porcupine. One of Johnny's best-loved characters was Carnac the Magnificent. The Question: What did Rodneys doctor tell him when he asked for a second opinion? . The Question: Name three things that always tell the truth. A: Jello and "Charlie's Angels." A: Tail of Two Cities. The character was taken from Steve Allens essentially identical Answer Man segment, which Allen performed during his tenure as host ofThe Tonight Showin the 1950s. Q: What does a masseuse do to your dub-dub? A: Until he gets caught. ", Ed McMahon's favorite Carnac the Magnificent punchline[5]. Paul Rosenzweig, George Washington University law professor and former deputy assistant secretary for policy in the Department of Homeland Security, told Yahoo News via email it reminded him of Johnny Carson's "Carnac the Magnificent" sketch "where he knows the . A: 20,000 Leagues Beneath the Sea. QUESTION: What do they put on horses at the Preparation H Ranch? Shriver. Q: What happens when your lorne rots? Q: What is it that Ronald Reagan keeps trying to hide? Message: Undefined variable: user_membership, File: /home/ah0ejbmyowku/public_html/application/views/user/popup_modal.php 1952? Alas, poor Yorick, dont forget your American Express card! Get Image Page 1 of 4 , The Question: What do you call pedestrians trying to cross I-220? A: Skalliwags. On Friday which would have been Carson's 95th birthday the National Comedy Center in Jamestown, N.Y., and the Elkhorn Valley Museum in Norfolk, Neb., will announce plans to preserve a trove of. Q: Name a chimp, a champ and a chump. A: Shareholder. A: Never on Sunday. A: Ransack. Q: What would you find in Superman's bathroom? Q: Name three things on the endangered species list. Or are you just happy to see me? A: Sex. The Question: What do you call a guy who likes to eat, drink, and be Mary? Of course, our good friend the Serpent is still crawling around on his belly just as he was cursed to do (see Genesis 3:14), and thats not going to change anytime soon. The Question: What is the only kind of science the president, the CDC, the FDA, Fauci, Big Pharma, and the media use to promote their COVID agendas? A: Mop and Glow. As Carnac the Magnificent, Carson would often cast a curse upon his audience in response to a joke bombing. Carnac the Magnificent was a recurring comedic role played by Johnny Carson on The Tonight Show Starring Johnny Carson. "Some sad news from Australia.the inventor of the boomerang grenadedied today. Q: Where does the line go outside an unemployment office? by ThomasFay. ", "Sis boom bah." Q: What does Zsa Zsa Gabor call the center of a church? The Question: What are three things less endangered than our freedom? Q: What do you call Hershey's Prune Kisses? "Johnny: "It was so cold, the politicians had their hands in their ownpockets. The Answer: Engagement ring, wedding ring, and suffering. In one instance, Carnac tripped and broke the desk! A: The Loch Ness Monster. A: A mule, a horse, Billy Carter. A: Damnation Alley. (Dr. Wuhan) , The Question: What is Kamala Harris approval rating? Q: What's in Jimmy Dean's sausages? , The Question: What highway would you take to get from Mendenhall to Puckett? Carnac: May the fleas of a thousand camels nest in your underpants. We have in the building tonight that great visitor from the East. us? Q: When you do get from a near-sighted rabbi? . prune juice? Sunday, 16 December 2018. Return to Humor Page Q: Name a Kirk, a Turk and a jerk. Scope and Content Script (Annotated "Ray") Box 4, Folder 44. Q: When is the next RTD bus scheduled to arrive? Story. Carnac the Magnificent was one of the highlights of the Johnny Carson Show. dickory? In the end, Eve not only gets a rib she gets everythingleaving Adam leafless and alone! The Question: Name four traits you have to have to be president in 2022. sister's hooped skirt. May a diseased yak squat in your hot tub. . CARNAC: May a desert rat sunbathe on your radar range. If you are of a certain age, you might yet remember "Carnac the Magnificent", a recurring comedic role played by Johnny Carson on The Tonight Show Starring Johnny Carson. The Question: Name three forms of identification when applying for welfare. A: Grape Nuts. Q: What does it say on the side of Phyllis Diller's dress? Q: What do crabs get high on? The Question: Name three famous puppets. Q: Name three people who like to bomb. Jackie Lynch 242 followers More information Q: What do CIA agents have to remember to go to the During his tenure, the late-night funny man interviewed everyone from President John F. Kennedy to Muhammad Ali. 4.5 4.5 out of 5 stars (164) $23.99 $ 23. The Answer: Because they are afraid someone will clean them. , The Question: Whats the name of Madonnas latest hit single? Amazon's Choice for carnac hat. Line: 479 While all were memorable, its her duet with Carson thats particularly unforgettable. the memoirs of Richard Nixon. A: "Leave it to Beaver." Disclaimer: If the University finds out what I'm doing, they probably couldn't care less. A: "Yes man." Q: Who old do you have to be to date Princess Margaret? A: Shake and bake. eyes? As a child of four can plainly see, these envelopes have been hermetically sealed and kept in a #2 size mayonnaise jar on Dr. Faucis porch since noon today. The Answer: 2 million, 83 thousand, three-hundred thirty-three dollars and thirty three cents per pound. Zippo? Line: 107 A: All the President's men. Q: What should the oil companies' new slogan be? I unfortunately have not kept up with this particularfield, so can enlighten you no further.--, Craig Werner !philabs!aecom!werner "Never attribute to malice what can be adequately explained by stupidity. a #2 mayonnaise The Answer: Kermit the Frog, Shrek, and Al Gore. Some of his one liners:"A loaf of bread, a jug of wine and thou. A: Sale of the Century. CARNAC: May a diseased yak squat in your hot tub. Line: 24 40 Carnac The Magnificent Photos and Premium High Res Pictures - Getty Images Editorial Editorial FILTERS CREATIVE EDITORIAL VIDEO 40 Carnac The Magnificent Premium High Res Photos Browse 40 carnac the magnificent stock photos and images available, or start a new search to explore more stock photos and images. . The character was introduced in 1964. Line: 478 A: Trapper John. A: Evon Guligan. There are more than 10 alternatives to Carnac for Mac, Windows, Linux and Xfce. Johnny Carson entertained audiences for 30 years as the host of The Tonight Show. From Carnac the Magnificent to his very close encounter with a python, heres our list of Carsons greatest moments. CARNAC: May a bag of Pop Rocks explode in your shorts. Pretending to psychically concentrate, Carnac periodically asked for "complete silence" from the audience, and McMahon would retort that he often got it.[6]. A: Rocky, Network and The Silver Streak. The Johnny Carson Show. -- Tim Thompson414 Morton HallOhio UniversityAthens, Ohio 45701{amc1,bgsuvax,cbdkc1,cbosgd,cuuxb,osu-eddie}!oucs!tim. Q: What does a stupid altar boy do? I have been able to obtain some really great similar brocade and will post that tonight. QUESTION: Name a clock, a jock and a crock. A: 2001. Q: How do you introduce your cat to a weeping willow? Carnac the Magnificent : [opens envelope and reads] "Name two movies and the Los Angeles Rams fight song." Johnny Carson : Back in New Jersey, two thousand pounds of human hair, it was gonna be made into wigs, fell off a truck in New Jersey and blocked the highway. A: Sir Lawrence Olivier, the Oscars and the oil shortage. We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers. The Question: Why do most married men die before their wives? The Question: What do you call a lady golfer who pulls her drives hard to the left? Q: What do you call a military coup led by General A: A potato, Burt Reynolds and Sgt. The Question: Describe the U.S. economy under the Obiden administration. Carnac the Magnificent was a recurring comedic role played by Johnny Carson on The Tonight Show Starring Johnny Carson. Q: What are Ernest and Julio Gallo? The Answer: Noah Daniels and Little Mort. 5.0 out of 5 stars 2. The Answer: Hes 97 and we dont know where the hell he is. Q: What do you call a drink made with un-cola and prune Ron Toth, Jr., Proprietor 72 Charles Street Rochester, New Hampshire 03867-3413 Phone: 1-603-335-2062 Email: ron.toth@timepassagesnostalgia.com A: Quarter Pounder. . Clarnac: May a toothless holy man give your grandmother a hickey. Question: Why does the Colonels Original Recipe Chicken not taste the same anymore? Food is produced in abundance with machines that allow just a few people to operate massive farms with ease. car? Q: What's a rude thing to say when you're dropping a bomb And even people who dont work at all need not starve, as food banks and charities abound, and governments provide welfare. Discover and Share the best GIFs on Tenor. Found 50507 ratings (with comment) There are 50,507 ratings (that include a comment). Clarnac: Get your mind out of the gutter. Line: 315 Q: What were some of the earlier forms of Preparation H? Reviewed in the United States on April 2, 2015. A: The Sugarland Express. Q: What do you say when it's Rose's turn at the bowling Price and other details may vary based on product size and color. Previous. Function: _error_handler, File: /home/ah0ejbmyowku/public_html/application/views/page/index.php A: Lady-in-waiting. Q: Where should you address all your mail? The Answer: At least you can get four quarters out of a dollar. the Denver Nuggets. A: Kirk Douglas, Terhan Bey and Earl Butz. Carson . A: Executive action. May you be rich enough to own a house with 100 rooms, and may you be found dead in every one of them. hajahe155 6 yr. ago. Q: What do you see if you hold your hernia up to a mirror? [applause]. Ed: (Ed points to the nearest exit and hands Clarnac the first envelop and says) Envelop number 1. Q: What do you say when calling your quat? So that when Balak brought Bilaam to the mountaintop so that he could view the Jews encamped down below and cast a curse upon them (see Numbers 23:28), Bilaam was moved to bless the Jewish people instead and to say, Mah Tovu Oholecha Yisrael How goodly are your tents, O Jacob , a blessing referring specifically to our beautiful Batei Keneses (Houses of Prayer) and Batei Midrash (Houses of Study). May your first born male child be trapped in a steam room with the VillagePeople. ), The Question: Who is the largest conservative in the Republican Party? May a desert weirdo lower his figs into your mother's soup. The Question: What is Pete Buttigiegs favorite planet? Historically, 1 in 100 women died in childbirth, and at some periods that number was as high as 4 in 10 women. , The Question: How did Marie Osmond lose 50 pounds with NutriSystem? Positive reaction would prompt disbelief from Carnac, stating the ease at which he could make people laugh, such as "This audience would laugh at Dinah Shore backing into a meat thermometer." Q: What does the Galloping Gourmet do during an earthquake? Q: What do you call a cop who frisks himself? Return to Carnac the Vote Devining Consultant Page The Question: What do Democrats in the Mississippi House of Representatives wish they had? Q: On a cold morning what forms on your david? The answer: "Sis boom bah." May your enemies get cramps in their legs as they dance on your grave. [1] A: Burn the candle at both ends. CARNAC: May a weird holy man light a Roman candle in your A: Green thumb. A: "Sorry bub, no pub." car industry. The Answer: Dr. Ben Casey, Dr. James Kildaire, Dr. Doogie Howser, Dr. Marcus Welby, Granny Moses (Beverly Hills) and Dr. Anthony Fauci. The Question: How did the dinosaurs become extinct? In article <9@psivax.UUCP>, a@psivax.UUCP (Al Schwartz) writes. the audience will cheer. This crowd is tougher than a camel pot roast. tooth? Carnac the Magnificent: [Opening envelope] What's the first thing you do when you hold up a liquor store? This was to some degree a variation on Steve Allen's recurring "The Question Man" sketch. NO ONE [at this shout, Carnac always acts startled] knows the contents of these envelopes but you, in your mystical and borderline divine way, will ascertain the answers having never before heard the questions. A Bronze Age civilization on the island of Crete and other islands in the Aegean Sea, the Minoan civilization flourished between 2600 and 1100 BC. CARNAC: May a weird holy man drop a cactus down your Sometimes Clarnac has to leave quickly. In the ongoing sketch, Carnac would draw a sealed envelope from a mayonnaise jar, and hold it to his forehead. A: 2001. Its hard to divine when you cant see. . Q: What is the total of Bo Derek and Phyllis Diller? May you be blessed with a son so smart he learns the mourner's prayerbefore his Bar-Mitzvah speech. Currently showing results page 1,636 of 2,021. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental or is intended purely as a satire, parody or spoof. Longtime sidekick Ed McMahon ritualistically and bombastically introduced the Carnac routines. The character was introduced in 1964. Jokes would also be topical; for instance, "Over 105 in Los Angeles" (presumably referring to the temperature) instead led to "Under the Reagan plan, how old would you have to be to collect Social Security?" , The Question: Where do you go for a drive-through facelift? "Carnac" would hold the sealed envelope to his forehead, mystically divine the answer, announce it to the audience, then tear open the envelope and read the question. . Q: How do you play piggyback with Telly Savales? be sending Georgia soon? More Quotes from Carnac the Magnificent show! https://www.torchweb.org, Torah Outreach Resource Center of Houston, Please Patronize Our Calendar Advertisers - Full Listing. . May a diseased yak leave a gift on your new carpet. May the bluebird of happiness twiddle your bits. Q: Name a Kristofferson. I hope it makes you laugh. plunger. The Question: Name an elephant, a donkey, and a Rino. Welcome once again, O Great Sage. The Question: How much is Oprah Winfrey worth? , The Question: How do you spell lahgahbahtahqua? . Funny story written by Dr. Billingsgate. Johnny Carson Carnak The Magnificent One Liners, Vladimir Putin, Kim Jong-Un, Justin Bieber, & Dick Cheney Form Secret Super He-Man Poker Club, A List of 10 Little Known Facts About David Letterman, ABC Sends "Charlie's Angels" To That Big Cancelled TV Show Studio In The Sky, Joan Rivers on the 'Tonight Show': "I still got a chance! A: Pussy Willow. Eds Intro: Ladies (if any) and gentlemen. Q: Name a leak, a Greek and a freak. A: The Newlywed Game. Q: Name three movements. stardew valley weapon tier list; mississippi state treasurer A: Double trouble. Q: What's an Orange County toothpaste? Carnac held each envelope to his forehead while "divining" the answer, then tore open the end of the envelope and loudly blew into it before removing the index card with the question. which sometimes gets more of a laugh than the entire Carnac routine previous. Q: What would you see if Orson Welles dropped his pants? The creative innuendos and delivery from Carson proved that the key to humor lies in making an inappropriate joke! (Was Sexy and I Know It), The Question: Name the one place more dangerous than Kabul, Afghanistan. I just got a new DVD, and I am really excited about it, but I miss my childhood a little bit I guess. The segment included several running gags. A: Ironware. The comedy came from an unexpected question following a seemingly straightforward answer. (Thats a Lady Gaga song), The Question: What are Caitlin Jenners measurements? Gotta be A: Sha-na-na. May the Shah of Iran seek refuge under your sister's skirt. [1] Q: What do you call a guy who streaks Minneapolis and St. The Question: Name the two dummies in the Gray-Daniels Auto Group commercial. Curses, Curses, Curses . The Question: What is the sure fire way to get rich beyond your wildest dreams without doing a thing. If a joke bombed, Carnac went after the audience with all kinds of creative curses including, "May the Shah of Iran seek refuge under your sister's skirt!" . [1] 36 relations: Billboard (magazine), Billet reading, Bob Arbogast, CNN, Columbia University Press, CRC Press, Curse, Divination, Ed McMahon, Ernie Kovacs, . night? The Answer: Become a professional politician. The character was introduced in 1964. Mary Worth: "Let me do a Carnac the Magnificent here in P-2. May your Perrier water be secretly bottled in Tijuana. Q: Where is the American dollar headed? stops. Margaret's door? One of the most memorable audience insults came after the Philadelphia 76ers swept the Los Angeles Lakers in the finals to win the 1983 NBA Championship, when Carnac retorted, "May Dr. J slam dunk your cat." [+6] - George - 11/14/2011 Answer: A goober, a cruller, and OmSigDavid. Q: What do you call a sadistic tailor? The Question: My grandpaw walked five miles a day when he was 60. -- -------------------------------------------------------------"they forcibly extracted the word 'but' from his vocabulary, and locked him in a room with 10 economists"-------------------------------------------------------------. A: E.S.T., P.M. and B.M. CARNAC: May you fall asleep under a camel with post nasal As a child of four can plainly see, these envelopes have been hermetically sealed. Please see our terms and conditions and disclaimer. A: You asked for it. A: Chariots of the Gods. "You Light Up My Life.". Q: What noise does Mr. McMahon's liver make? KeyCastr. I hold in my hand these Pat McCormickwrote some of the zaniest Carnac material. Carnac was added to AlternativeTo by Gbeworld on Mar 16, 2013 and this page was last updated Oct 20, 2021. all positive negative relevance date. Carnac the Magnificent In one of his most famous sketches, Johnny Carson channeled his psychic abilities as "Carnac the Magnificent." Carson, dressed in a turban and cape, would predict the. CARNAC: May your wife give mouth-to-mouth resusitation to [9], File: /home/ah0ejbmyowku/public_html/application/views/user/popup_modal.php Q: Describe the five finalists in the Miss Universe Q: What would you keep if you had to choose between sex and Function: _error_handler, File: /home/ah0ejbmyowku/public_html/application/views/user/popup_harry_book.php (You should die young enough for her to walk there under her own steam.). May the fleas of a thousand camels nest in your jock strap. A: 50 miles per hour. A: Fort Knox. JOHNNY CARSON'S MAGICAL BEGINNINGS. The crowd burst into laugher as the handler attempted to free The Tonight Show host from the animals grasp. A: A full moon Necessity dictates the insertion of an appropriate disclamatory proclamation into this section of this missive, both for assuredness of legality, and to satisfy my lust for bombast. May a crazy holy man set fire to your nose hair. Make a meme Make a gif Make a chart The Magical Thinking of Trump. Carnac joke: He was holding up objects that supposedly had been fished out of the Hudson River. The Answer: I didnt think I had enough gas. Carnac the Magnificent: Three Dog Night & Mount Baldy on Johnny Carson's Tonight Show Johnny Carson 772K subscribers Subscribe 5.9K 1.1M views 11 years ago Watch Carson episodes every night on. Are you sure you want to cancel your membership with us? Q: What does President Carter say to Billy on Air Force Q: Name the father of Mrs. Olsen's illegitamate baby. A: David Frost. Find Funny GIFs, Cute GIFs, Reaction GIFs and more. A: WKRP In Cincinnati. A: Fit to be tied. ED: Certainly worth waiting for The one that had McMahon and Carson nearly rolling on the floor with sustained laughter was Sis boom bah. One of Carson's most well-known characters, Carnac was a "mystic from the East" who could psychically "divine" unknown answers to unseen questions. , Ed: I hold in my hand the last envelop! Q: What do you get when you squat on a rosy red fire? May a carsick camel moisten your Egg McMuffin. Q: Name one guy who's rich after April 15th. A: "Breaking Away" and "Here's Boomer." (crowd cheers). How about May an unclean yak sit on your dinner. A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z, Accomplish Achieve Achieving American Art Attitude Awesome Beautiful Belief Believe Car Carly Fiorina Change Children Control Creation Creative Death Defeat Desire Direct Education Enthusiasm Exercise Existence Faith Forgiving Freedom Friend Friends Future God Good Enough Government Gratitude Happy Heart Hillary Clinton History Human Husband Illegal Imagination Imagine Incredible Innovation Israel Law Leadership Life Love Lucky Manage Managers Marines Marriage Military Morning Motivated Nature Negotiation Not Enough Obama Outside Peace Politics Reality Responsibility Sacrifice Science Shark Tank Significant Successful Sun Surprise Technology Today Travel True Truth Truthfulness Universe War Wife Winning World, "I am kind of an old soul.

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